2013 draws to an end.
One child leaves primary school. Another is almost taller than me. The third can almost fit my shoes. My pretty shoes!
Twelve months ago I couldn’t see red Christmas lights and the headache couldn’t be fixed.
So, almost a year after diagnosis, how do I feel? Relaxed and positive and grateful.
Things could be worse. My relapse was just that. Enough to get me diagnosed, and encourage me to a better lifestyle. Having given up saturated fat, I am now a size 8-10 from a 14. No girl would complain with that. I don’t even crave hash browns or chips and gravy anymore. I am enjoying salmon and vegetables. Even those that come in salads. my dog is happy with regular walks and my back is happier with strengthening through Body Balance – a cross between yoga, pilates and tai chi.
My down days are when I think of the what ifs. What if I cant think as clearly and my brain goes. What if I can’t move as quickly and think as quickly as I like. What if my body is so unreliable that I can’t plan anything with confidence. What if I fall within the gap between being able to perform my job at the level I rose and salary I earn, but can’t qualify for my invalidity pension. What if I can’t afford to provide for my family. What if the only tangible option is to die and leave them my death benefits.
then I snap myself out of it and focus on the positives. Nothing will happen overnight. I have a wonderful family and fabulous twitter role models. And a good attitude overall. And have time to plan for alternate income streams – a self funded early retirement if you will.
i am grateful to so many and for so much. And the advances in technology, medicine and natural therapies is progressing all the time. the longer I and we stay as healthy as we can, the more time we give others to kiss multiple sclerosis goodbye.