Today is just another day on a journey that takes a lifetime

Insomnia and fatigue. The former started 12 years ago, on and off. Times of stress. Times when my brain just needed those hours in the middle of the night to process.

The fatigue, since I can’t remember when. I remember sleeping most days, but blaming it on partying all night. Days organising a dinner party with a nana nap in the afternoon. Studying, well a couple of hours at the books, an hour with my pillow.

when did this all begin? At what point should I have seen the symptoms?

In 2004 I was pregnant. And exhausted. Terribly so. Blood test confirmed anemia and b12 deficiency. But was it more? It was only months after an optic neuritis attack.

In 2005, with 3 kids, again I was tired. Terribly, terribly so. Unable to get out of bed some days. Was this a sign? Of looming MS  or just being a mum?

I can’t remember a time when I have had energy. To burn. Adrenalin is easy. Create the deadline, grab and harness the energy. But once the project is delivered, exhaustion.

i love my husband and family. I desperately want to show them how much. Give them the energy they deserve.

not really the blog I planned. But from my heart.


Focusing on what I can control – Diet

A few years ago, I was tired. Really really tired. Several months, blood tests and a ‘top and tail’ later, I am not coeliac. But I am anaemic as well as having pernicious anemia and Graves’ disease. Two of these three are autoimmune. None can be cured.

but, stubborn little thing that I am, I googled. And googled, and researched. Sound familiar? Apparently, soy can trigger thyroid issues, so I switched back to cows mAlmost here is also a school of thought that gluten impairs the body’s ability to absorb nutrients. Such as vitamin b12 and iron.

So despite coeliac tests being negative, I gave up gluten. There were tears. Ceremonial saying goodbye to favourite cookbooks and recipes. But I did it anyway.

A funny thing happened. The chronic abdominal pain went away. The constant bloating went away. Immediately. I was one sausage sizzle away from the bloating and pain. I know, I did tests. Then another thing happened. My Graves went into remission. Doctors say you can’t be cured, but I have been normal for 7 years. And I have gone from monthly b12 injections to once a year. Iron is still a problem.

oh, and I had a relapse 12 months before I gave up gluten. It took another 8 years for my next. 

I don’t know whether gluten was a factor. But I have learned to live without it. All the diet advice for MS suggests healthy living, low sat fat, more fish and minimal to nil processed foods. So, any time I want hot chips, I figure I can have all I want when I am in a wheelchair. But not today. Same with chocolate, cream sauces and cakes. We have all read about the strict diets. I can’t give up meat. Given my inability to absorb iron, that would be dumb. But I am replacing 1-2 meals a week with fish.

I am a living experiment, but aren’t we all.